SOFT CORNER

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Any tips for sex after having had a baby?

Any tips regarding sex after having had a baby? I’m feeling ready, but nervous! #askingforafriend

Dear Desiring Prep,

Slow Down

Take it slow. Sex can feel like new territory after having a baby. Be sure to be vocal with your partner about what feels good and what isn’t  working for you. 

Be Tender

It can be tender, but it should not be painful. If there is pain, your body may be signaling that it just needs a little bit more time to recover. 

Lubricate

Be sure to use a lubricant. Postpartum and breastfeeding hormones can decrease your normal vaginal fluids regardless of your state of arousal. And don’t forget to make it a natural pH balanced lubricant! 

Wait

It’s ok to change your mind and wait a little longer. You’re the best expert in your body and if your intuition says you’re not ready, listen! 

Milk Happens

Milk let down with orgasm is normal. Don’t panic if this one happens! Way to go on the orgasm and remember how radical your body is!

Find Control

Being “on top” can help you control penetration and what your body is comfortable with.

Run the Show

Feeling over-touched in the postpartum period is a very real sensation. Add a little spice (and control) to your sex life with directed-touch. During intercourse, ask your partner to wait until you explicitly invite touch to your body.

Warm-up

Penetration can feel daunting after having a baby, so start out with a little outercourse loving first!